How to Disappear Completely
"How to Disappear Completely" is a song by the English rock band Radiohead, serving as the fourth track on their fourth studio album, Kid A, which was released on October 2, 2000, by Parlophone Records.[1] The track is renowned for its ethereal, orchestral arrangement featuring layered strings, ambient electronics, and Thom Yorke's haunting vocals, creating a dreamlike atmosphere that encapsulates themes of detachment and escape.[2] The song's creation stemmed from lead singer Thom Yorke's personal experiences during the grueling OK Computer world tour in 1997, which left him overwhelmed by fame and exhaustion, culminating in a disastrous, rain-soaked performance at Glastonbury Festival.[2] To cope, R.E.M. frontman Michael Stipe advised Yorke to repeat the mantra "I'm not here, this isn't happening," a phrase that directly became the song's chorus and a central lyrical motif expressing dissociation and mental refuge.[3] Additionally, the title draws from Doug Richmond's 1985 self-help book How to Disappear Completely and Never Be Found, a guide to assuming a new identity, reflecting the song's undercurrent of vanishing from one's reality.[2] Yorke later described the track as originating from a vivid dream where he floated ghost-like down Dublin's River Liffey, an image inspired by a prior concert there, further infusing the piece with an out-of-body sensation.[4] Musically, "How to Disappear Completely" marked Radiohead's shift toward experimental electronica and ambient sounds on Kid A, with production involving strings arranged by Jonny Greenwood and performed by the Orchestra of St John's, conducted by John Lubbock.[5] The song debuted live in 1998 under a longer title and evolved through performances before its studio refinement, contributing to Kid A's critical acclaim as a bold reinvention of the band's sound following the rock-oriented OK Computer.[6] Themes of alienation and fleeting peace resonate throughout the lyrics, such as "That there, that's not me / I go where I please," positioning the track as a poignant exploration of anxiety and transcendence that has endured as one of Radiohead's most beloved and emotionally resonant works.[2] In a 2006 BBC interview, Yorke himself hailed it as "the most beautiful thing [they] ever did."[7]Background and Inspiration
Writing Process
The writing process for "How to Disappear Completely" began with frontman Thom Yorke's personal experiences of exhaustion and detachment during Radiohead's extensive OK Computer tour in 1997. Following a rain-soaked performance at Dublin's RDS Arena on June 21, 1997, Yorke experienced a vivid dream in which he floated helplessly down the River Liffey, evoking a sense of uncontrollable drift and dissociation.[6] This imagery directly shaped the song's core theme of escape and impermanence, with Yorke later describing the entire track as an extension of that floating sensation, stating, "I dreamt I was floating down the Liffey and there was nothing I could do. I was flying around Dublin and I really was in the Dream. The whole song is my experiences of really floating."[6] The lyrics, particularly the chorus—"I'm not here / This isn't happening"—emerged from advice Yorke received from R.E.M. singer Michael Stipe amid his tour-induced burnout. In a 2000 interview, Yorke recounted calling Stipe in distress, saying, "I cannot cope with this," to which Stipe replied, "Pull the shutters down and keep saying, 'I'm not here, this is not happening.'"[8] Yorke adopted this phrase as a mantra for psychological detachment, incorporating it verbatim into the song to convey a ritualistic denial of overwhelming reality. He elaborated that the chorus functioned as "a chant to sort of get out of things that... get out of a situation that just felt wrong," reflecting the fragmented emotional state of the Kid A sessions.[9] Musically, the song originated from a vocal melody Yorke developed in late 1997 or early 1998, drawing on ambient and orchestral influences to match the lyrics' ethereal quality. It debuted live on April 1, 1998, at the Wiltern Theatre in Los Angeles under the full title "How to Disappear Completely (and Never Be Found)," dedicated to producer Nigel Godrich, indicating early band involvement in refining the structure.[6] During the Kid A recording sessions in 1999–2000 at locations including Malibu and Copenhagen, multi-instrumentalist Jonny Greenwood handled the string orchestration, inspired by the dissonant, atmospheric techniques of Polish composer Krzysztof Penderecki, whose works like Threnody to the Victims of Hiroshima influenced Greenwood's approach to creating immersive, swelling textures.[10] Yorke noted the contrast between the "pretty straight" lyrics and the "extremely not straight" orchestration, which amplified the song's disorienting escape narrative.[9] The band iteratively layered elements like ondes Martenot glissandi and subtle percussion, prioritizing emotional immersion over traditional rock dynamics.Personal Influences
The creation of "How to Disappear Completely" was deeply rooted in Thom Yorke's personal struggles with fame following Radiohead's exhaustive OK Computer tour in 1997. Yorke experienced severe anxiety and paranoia, exacerbated by the pressures of celebrity. This period of emotional distress profoundly shaped the song's themes of detachment and escape.[8] A pivotal personal influence came from a conversation with R.E.M. frontman Michael Stipe, a friend who offered advice on coping with celebrity pressures. Yorke has credited Stipe's guidance as a lifeline during his breakdown, with the chorus lyrics "I'm not here / This isn't happening" stemming from Stipe's suggestion to repeat that phrase as a mantra for dissociation. Michael Stipe later confirmed the anecdote, noting it stemmed from a discussion on handling fame's toll.[8][11] The song's verses drew from a vivid dream Yorke had while in Ireland, where he imagined floating helplessly down the River Liffey in Dublin, pursued by a tidal wave and unable to control his movement. He described the experience as immersive: "I dreamt I was floating down the Liffey and there was nothing I could do. I was flying around Dublin, and I really was in the dream." This surreal vision of weightlessness and vulnerability mirrored his real-life desire to vanish amid overwhelming scrutiny, infusing the lyrics with imagery of ethereal drifting, such as "That there, that's not me" and "I float down the Liffey." Yorke later reflected that the entire track captured this floating sensation, marking it as one of Radiohead's most poignant expressions of personal turmoil.[2][12]Recording and Production
Studio Sessions
The recording sessions for "How to Disappear Completely" took place primarily during the latter half of 1999 and early 2000, as part of Radiohead's broader work on the Kid A album at their Canned Applause Studios in Oxford. Initial demoing began in December 1999, with drummer Phil Selway laying down drum tracks on December 1, which guitarist Ed O'Brien described in his diary as providing a strong foundation for the song's drifting rhythm.[13] The following day, December 2, multi-instrumentalist Jonny Greenwood contributed multitracked parts on the Ondes Martenot, an early electronic instrument, creating the song's ethereal, wavering string-like textures; O'Brien noted that these additions made the demo feel nearly complete.[13] Vocalist Thom Yorke recorded his lead vocals around this time, which O'Brien praised as "jaw-dropping" in their emotional delivery.[13] Selway updated fans on the official Radiohead message board on December 3, 1999, stating that "Parts I & II are finished - the final movement is proving a little tricky though," indicating ongoing refinements to the song's structure during these early sessions.[6] By mid-January 2000, Greenwood had spent two weeks composing detailed string arrangements inspired by the Ondes Martenot layers, initially envisioning them as multitracked performances of the instrument played one part at a time.[14] Producer Nigel Godrich, posting on the message board on January 19, 2000, confirmed the track's length at approximately six minutes and expressed satisfaction with its progress, though he had not revisited it recently.[6] An early full-band attempt at the song during these sessions drew criticism from Yorke, who remarked, "That sounds great, but it sounds like old Radiohead," prompting further experimentation to align it with the album's abstract aesthetic.[15] The song's orchestral elements were realized on February 4, 2000, when Greenwood's string scores were recorded live with the 24-piece Orchestra of St John's, Smith Square, conducted by John Lubbock at Dorchester Abbey, a 12th-century church near Oxford known for its resonant acoustics.[13] Greenwood performed Ondes Martenot live alongside the ensemble to add a high, floating line, though he later described the instrument as sounding out of tune in the mix; the real strings ultimately replaced most of the multitracked Ondes parts for a richer, more immersive quality.[14] Godrich captured the session digitally using an Apple G3 computer, hard drives, and microphones without analog tape, emphasizing the band's shift toward a more fluid, technology-driven production process. O'Brien's diary entry from that day highlighted the venue's exceptional sound, with Godrich reportedly "blown away" by the results.[13] These sessions marked a pivotal evolution for the track, transforming its initial demo into the swirling, dreamlike centerpiece of Kid A.Orchestral Elements
The orchestral elements of "How to Disappear Completely" are dominated by a string arrangement composed by Radiohead's Jonny Greenwood, which forms the song's core atmospheric texture. The arrangement features lush, swelling strings that evoke a sense of ethereal drifting, blending acoustic guitar and ambient effects to create an immersive, dreamlike quality. Greenwood scored the parts specifically for the track, drawing on his growing interest in classical orchestration during the Kid A sessions.[16][8] These strings were performed by the Orchestra of St. John's, a chamber ensemble, under the direction of conductor John Lubbock. The recording took place in early 2000 at Dorchester Abbey, a 12th-century church in Oxfordshire, England, chosen for its natural reverb that enhanced the ambient depth of the performance. The session involved a small string section, including violins played by Sue Lynn, Marjorie Hodge, Jeremy Metcalfe, and others, providing the layered, harmonic swells that underpin Thom Yorke's vocals. Producer Nigel Godrich assisted in the integration of these elements, ensuring they meshed seamlessly with the band's electronic and guitar-based components.[16][17] Complementing the acoustic strings is Greenwood's use of the ondes Martenot, an early 20th-century electronic instrument known for its haunting, vocal-like tones. Greenwood plays a high, gliding line on the ondes Martenot that weaves through the orchestral layers, adding a synthetic yet organic shimmer reminiscent of classical film scores. This instrument, which Greenwood had explored since OK Computer, bridges the gap between the live orchestra and the song's experimental production, contributing to its overall sense of weightless immersion. In a 2001 BBC Radio 3 interview, Greenwood highlighted the ondes Martenot's role in the track's high-register melodies, emphasizing its fluid expressiveness.[16][14]Composition and Analysis
Musical Structure
"How to Disappear Completely" is composed in the key of F♯ minor, employing a tempo of 102 beats per minute to evoke a languid, drifting pace.[18] The song's harmonic foundation relies on a progression centered on the tonic F♯ minor chord, supplemented by the subdominant B minor and dominant C♯ minor, which contribute to its melancholic and introspective tone.[19] These chords exhibit higher-than-average complexity for popular music, with novel progressions that avoid conventional resolutions, enhancing the sense of ambiguity and suspension.[19] The overall form adheres to a verse-chorus structure with an extended introduction and outro, comprising distinct sections: intro, verse, chorus, pre-outro, and outro.[19] The intro establishes an ethereal atmosphere through layered string arrangements featuring dissonant clusters and glissandi, drawing inspiration from the avant-garde techniques of Polish composer Krzysztof Penderecki, whose influence shaped guitarist Jonny Greenwood's orchestration.[20] Verses unfold over the core chord progression, with Thom Yorke's vocals delivered in a hushed, reverb-heavy manner that mirrors the lyrics' theme of dissociation, while the chorus intensifies with swelling strings and subtle rhythmic pulses, creating a climactic release without abrupt dynamic shifts.[21] Rhythmically, the track features polyrhythmic tensions with the guitar providing a 12/8 triplet feel contrasted against the bass in 4/4, resulting in a sensation of weightlessness and temporal disorientation that reinforces the song's themes.[22] This metrical ambiguity persists throughout, particularly in the pre-outro and outro, where ambient washes and fading strings dissolve the structure into improvisation-like fades, eschewing a firm resolution and aligning with the song's conceptual escape from fixed forms.[19] The composition's layered buildup—from sparse acoustic guitar and ondes Martenot in early sections to full orchestral density—prioritizes textural evolution over rigid sectional boundaries, a hallmark of Radiohead's experimental approach on Kid A.[19]Lyrics and Interpretation
The lyrics of "How to Disappear Completely," the fourth track on Radiohead's 2000 album Kid A, consist of fragmented, repetitive verses that evoke a sense of detachment and ethereal movement. They read as follows:That there, that's not meThe song's title derives from Doug Richmond's 1985 self-help book How to Disappear Completely and Never Be Found, a manual on assuming new identities to escape one's past, which resonated with frontman Thom Yorke's experiences of overwhelming fame following the 1997 tour for OK Computer. Yorke has described the lyrics as stemming from a period of intense burnout, particularly after a disastrous, rain-drenched performance at the Glastonbury Festival in 1997, where he felt on the verge of collapse and declared, "That's it. I can't take this anymore". In response to his distress, R.E.M. frontman Michael Stipe, a mentor figure, advised Yorke to "pull the shutters down and keep saying, 'I'm not here, this is not happening,'" a mantra that directly informed the song's central refrain and its theme of psychological withdrawal.[2] The composition also draws from a vivid dream Yorke recounted, in which he floated down Dublin's River Liffey as if ghostly and untethered, unable to control his movement, an image mirrored in lines like "I walk through walls / I float down the Liffey". This dreamlike quality underscores the song's exploration of dissociation—a coping mechanism for alienation amid celebrity pressures—blending the allure of invisibility with the terror of erasure. Critics have interpreted the lyrics as a meditation on escapism, where sensory overload ("Strobe lights and blown speakers / Fireworks and hurricanes") contrasts with the desire for nonexistence, reflecting broader Kid A themes of reinvention and emotional numbness in a hyper-mediated world. Yorke's delivery, layered over swelling strings, amplifies this ambiguity, evoking both serene drift and underlying dread, as if the narrator is both liberated and lost in their vanishing act.[23][7][24][23]
I go where I please
I walk through walls
I float down the Liffey
I'm not here
This isn't happening In a little while
I'll be gone
The moment's already passed
Yeah, it's all gone That there, that's not me
I go where I please
I walk through walls
I float down the Liffey
I'm not here
This isn't happening Strobe lights and blown speakers
Fireworks and hurricanes
I'm not here
This isn't happening[7]
Release and Promotion
Album Context
Kid A, Radiohead's fourth studio album, was released on October 2, 2000, by Parlophone in the United Kingdom and Capitol Records in the United States.[1] Following the immense success of their 1997 album OK Computer, which propelled the band to global stardom but also led to creative burnout and intense media scrutiny, Kid A marked a deliberate artistic pivot toward electronic, ambient, and experimental sounds, abandoning traditional rock structures in favor of layered textures and minimal vocals.[25] The album's creation stemmed from sessions in 1999 and 2000, producing enough material for two records, with the subsequent Amnesiac released in 2001 from the same recordings.[1] The release strategy for Kid A eschewed conventional promotion, reflecting the band's desire to subvert expectations and reclaim artistic control. No singles were issued, and traditional music videos were replaced by abstract online "blips"—short animated clips debuted on the band's website and MTV—to build intrigue without commercial overexposure.[25] When the album leaked online two weeks before its official release, Radiohead responded by streaming the full record on their website for free, turning the breach into an opportunity to engage fans directly and foreshadowing modern digital distribution models.[1] Promotion included limited live shows, such as appearances on Saturday Night Live and a brief North American tour, alongside email-based interviews and a press listening event in an empty warehouse using wireless headphones, emphasizing intimacy over spectacle.[25] Commercially, Kid A debuted at number one on the Billboard 200, selling 207,000 copies in its first week despite zero radio airplay, and has since been certified platinum in the United States with global sales exceeding 4 million units as of 2019.[26][27][28] This success validated the band's risky approach, positioning Kid A as a landmark in alternative music that influenced the integration of electronica into rock and anticipated the streaming era.[25] Within Kid A, "How to Disappear Completely" occupies the fourth track position, bridging the album's frenetic opener "The National Anthem" and the ambient instrumental "Treefingers."[29] As an orchestral centerpiece featuring swelling strings from the Orchestra of St. John's, the song provides emotional respite amid the record's glitchy, synthetic landscapes, embodying themes of dissociation and escape that permeate the album's exploration of alienation in a digital age.[1]Media Appearances
The song "How to Disappear Completely" has been featured in select documentary and television productions, often selected for its ethereal and introspective qualities that align with themes of isolation or environmental fragility.[30] In the 2011 documentary film The Island President, directed by Jon Shenk, the track appears as part of a soundtrack comprising 14 Radiohead songs cleared specifically for the project, which chronicles the efforts of Maldivian president Mohamed Nasheed to combat climate change. The song's ambient strings and dreamlike atmosphere complement the film's portrayal of existential threats to low-lying island nations, underscoring moments of quiet reflection amid global inaction. Radiohead contributed the music without compensation, with frontman Thom Yorke also serving as an executive producer.[30][31][32] The track was also used in the premiere episode of the 2014 BBC Two miniseries The Honourable Woman, titled "The Empty Chair," created by Hugo Blick and starring Maggie Gyllenhaal. It plays during a pivotal scene involving the protagonist Nessa Stein (Gyllenhaal) as she grapples with personal and political turmoil in the Middle East, enhancing the sequence's sense of dissociation and emotional drift. The placement highlights the song's ability to evoke a ghostly detachment, mirroring the character's psychological state.[33][34][35]Reception and Legacy
Critical Reviews
Upon its release as part of Radiohead's 2000 album Kid A, "How to Disappear Completely" received widespread critical acclaim for its ethereal orchestration and emotional depth, often highlighted as a pinnacle of the band's experimental shift. Brent DiCrescenzo of Pitchfork described it as a string-laden ballad that "boils down 'Let Down' and 'Karma Police' to their spectral essence," with the strings "melt[ing] and weep[ing]" to evoke an underwater mode, emphasizing Thom Yorke's falsetto delivery of dissociative lyrics like "I'm not here/This isn't happening."[36] The song's inspiration from a Michael Stipe-suggested mantra and Yorke's nightmare of floating down Dublin's River Liffey was noted in Uncut's retrospective ranking of Radiohead's greatest songs, underscoring its roots in personal escapism amid fame's pressures.[37] Critics praised the track's transcendent quality and its role in Kid A's abstract catharsis. In a 2000 AV Club review, Nathan Rabin called it "transcendent," suggesting the title encapsulated Radiohead's desire to evade celebrity scrutiny, marking a "clear" pivot to the album's more ambient sections.[38] A 2009 AV Club decade-end assessment lauded Yorke's "fantastically desolate" vocal performance, crediting the band for harnessing constraints into innovative beauty.[39] NME's 2010 retrospective positioned it as "the ultimate expression of what Yorke had been groping towards" on prior albums like The Bends and OK Computer, capturing "existential horror" through lines evoking modernity's unreality.[40] Similarly, a 2021 Line of Best Fit review of Kid A Mnesia hailed it as "possibly the most improbably moving example of a rock star moaning about the unbearable weight of success."[41] While predominantly positive, some reviews critiqued its pacing and mood. The Guardian's Alexis Petridis, in a 2010 reappraisal, found it "mumbles and drags too drearily even for this die-hard Tindersticks fan," reflecting a minority view that its dreamlike haze bordered on tedium.[42] Consequence of Sound's 2017 song ranking acknowledged its sadness but appreciated how it "teases a fall into maudlin treacle but refuses to sink to that level," balancing vulnerability with restraint.[43] In Stereogum's 2020 anniversary piece, it was framed as a key ballad contrasting denial ("This isn’t happening") with the album's encroaching reality, contributing to Kid A's enduring emotional power through a "shrill symphonic void."[44]Live Performances and Covers
Radiohead debuted "How to Disappear Completely" live during the OK Computer tour on April 1, 1998, at the Universal Amphitheatre in Universal City, California, in an early arrangement that predated the Kid A recording.[45] The song became a staple of the band's subsequent Kid A and Amnesiac tours from 2000 to 2002, where it was performed with orchestral elements including strings and Ondes Martenot, enhancing its immersive, ambient quality.[46] Overall, Radiohead has performed the track 190 times across various tours as of November 2025, including the In Rainbows Tour (2008) and A Moon Shaped Pool Tour (2016–2018), often as a mid-set highlight or closer to evoke introspection.[47] Notable performances include the band's appearance at Canal+ Studios in Paris on April 28, 2001, a stripped-down rendition broadcast on French television that captured the song's ethereal vulnerability with minimal instrumentation.[48] Another standout is the live version from Buenos Aires on March 24, 2009, during the In Rainbows Tour, praised for Thom Yorke's haunting vocals and the band's swelling arrangement, which transformed the track into an emotional pinnacle rather than a typical uplifting finale.[49] In the band's 2025 reunion tour, the song reappeared in the encore at Movistar Arena in Madrid on November 4, following classics like "Paranoid Android," marking its return after a seven-year hiatus from full-band shows.[50] Thom Yorke has incorporated the song into his solo tours, delivering intimate acoustic interpretations. During his 2024 world tour, he performed it in venues such as Christchurch, New Zealand (October 23), Melbourne, Australia (October 30), and Singapore's Star Theatre (November 5), emphasizing the lyrics' themes of dissociation with sparse guitar and vocals.[51] These solo renditions, often closing sets, highlight Yorke's personal connection to the track, which he has described as one of Radiohead's most beautiful compositions.[52] The song has inspired several covers by artists reinterpreting its dreamlike atmosphere. Norwegian singer-songwriter Ane Brun recorded a version for her 2017 covers album Leave Me Breathless, featuring delicate vocals and piano that underscore the track's emotional fragility, released as a single with praise for its exquisite tenderness.[53] Indie artist Lotte Kestner included an a cappella-style cover on her 2017 album Covers, using layered harmonies to evoke isolation and vastness, drawing from her background in ethereal reinterpretations.[54] The Vitamin String Quartet offered an instrumental string arrangement in 2004 on their tribute album VSQ Performs Radiohead, capturing the song's swelling orchestration with classical precision.[55]Personnel
Radiohead
- Thom Yorke – lead vocals, acoustic guitar[7]
- Jonny Greenwood – electric guitar, ondes Martenot, string arrangements[7]
- Ed O'Brien – electric guitar, backing vocals[7]
- Colin Greenwood – bass guitar[7]
- Phil Selway – drums[7]
Additional musicians
- The Orchestra of St. John's – strings[7]
- John Lubbock – conductor (orchestra)